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I don’t want to be told I’m beautiful.

I don’t want to be called pretty or gorgeous or anything.

No, I don’t want none of that.

Nah…

You know, it’s like… like everyday telling me, “Hey, Madonna is famous”

Or “Your hair looks nice today.”

BAH!

Listen doll-face, I know who I am.

I know what I am and what I look like.

You don’t have to lie to me…

Well Wait- you’re not so much lying as… well… running out of new ways to dazzle me.

And you know it And its killing you and that kills me and one day soon youll look to me and say “gee, golly, Crystal, you sure are beautiful”, and then BAM we’ll both be dead and neither of us will look very beautiful at all.

So, no no no.

No more of that.

Instead, I recommend-

1) Tell me a joke.

Now, I don’t care if its naughty, silly, stupid, lame, old, new, racist, dirty, something you’ve put together over time or came up with on a whim – but I will laugh, I promise you that. I will chuckle or roar with laughter, or smirk and call you a buffoon. And then you’ll smile and laugh and you’ll tickle me and ill fall over and so will you trying to catch me and then we’ll both be on the ground laughing hysterically and trying not to pee our pants ( and trying not to let each other know about peeing our pants!)

(J)

2) Surprise me.

Blind fold me and tell me not to speak. Take me somewhere fun. Or romantic. Or memorable…… Or….. just talk to me. Tell me what you think about day to day- I won’t interrupt, I will be bound by the “no-speaking” clause. J You could even trick me, and tickle the daylights out of me. Ill either laugh and smile and playfully hit you, or do the pretend-pouty thing I do so well. And you will “feel awful” and kiss me. And trust me, that kiss will be wonderful.

3) Tell me you love me.

Now, I do not mean just walk by and say “I love you babe,” without so much as a glance at me. No, I mean, Move me. Maybe a couple times a month or so. Hold me real close like. (Not like the times before, but closer-without crushing me, of course!) Look at me. Not in my eyes- just at me. Now –you’re close, but you have to rock this next part or it’s not nearly as special-kiss me, tender but passionate-like. No tongue- just lips, and then linger just a tiny bit before NOW looking into my eyes and telling me I mean the world to you. Telling me that you can’t imagine life without me. Telling me that you are in love with me (and use my full name, I’ll melt!)- Not that you love me, but that you are IN love with me. Trust me, it matters.

4) Don’t say anything.

Granted, this one is tricky. If you nail this one more than twice I might just have to marry you!

There are times when- very rare times- I don’t need words. I don’t need a joke, or a surprise or adventure. And I not need to be told that I am loved. These times, I just want to be in your arms. I want to fall asleep in them and pretend like nothing else in the world matters at all. And if you ruin that moment by talking to me (even if you are trying to be romantic) I will hate you for about 6 seconds…. Now what makes this extra tricky is that if it is NOT one of those times, and you tell me nothing, I will hate you for about 6 minutes. And it will not be fun for either of us. So be warned, my love.

5) Be there.

You tell me that you will always be here for me. You tell me you will never leave me and you will always love me. Don’t just say it… do it. Stay with me. Forever and always. Be there for me. Always love me. And I promise you, my love I will return the favor J

Okay. So I lied a little.

It IS wonderful to be told I am beautiful.

So don’t completely forget it. But use some variety darling! Mix it up, and make me beg to know what’s next! I will be yours for forever and an eternity (whether you do or do not listen to this list, of course) But it is up to us to know how smoothly it will go.

http://www.brickfish.com/Pages/PhotosAlbums/PhotoView.aspx?picid=687242_86633901&=fast_features_PPIMEMAIL&isep=1&pbapi=-1&pbvi=45957614

copy paste all that, and vote for my face! :]

I’m Leaving for Virginia, tomorrow, 2 am.
Then we’re (me and my family) gonna drive through all the states up to New York, NY. Visiting all my East coast family, historic landmarks and Cities, and many many hotels and gas stations.
….
Yes, quite the adventure. All in a rental car full of 5 people and all their luggage.

wooooooo!

haha, as bothersome as some of it seems, i’m jazzed.

So, Ill still be able to get online and such when im there, but just not as much. so anyone who avidly reads my posts can have a short vacay along with me :) lol (all .5 of the people who read these things…. lol)

I’ll be back October 4th, 2009.

……. ;p jaykaaaay. October 4th, 2008.

(lame joke, i know, i know.
)

peeeeace outtt

im pretty sure ive succeeded in having everyone hate me to some degree…

My boyfriend wont talk to me, and i’m too stubborn and ashamed to start a conversation with him.

My family thinks im just being difficult and yell at me or ask me if i need to see a doctor mockingly.

My life is unfolding just like i knew it would.

I cant cry anymore. These past few days have been filled with anonymous tears. after the night before last, i feel like shit. i definitely took it too far, most likely. But i wasnt scared. i was numb. i didnt care. for once in my life i didnt give a damn about what anyone would think. anyway. now im just kind of… exsisting. im not living.theres more to life than what im going through.

Probably start making my posts private. at least, my very personal ones.

FYI…